Randi Rhodes: God's Governor

It's Friday, ya bastids!

There’s a great clip of Rick Perry on a Christian talk show last year, talking about how “supernatural events” guided his life, saying “all through life there have been these supernatural events.” Well, if by “supernatural” you mean events that cannot be explained, I would have to say you’re wrong. If you mean events that YOU can’t explain, well then, most everything would be supernatural. It’s no wonder that someone as dumb as Rick Perry thinks that his world is guided by forces beyond his understanding. EVERYTHING is beyond Rick Perry’s understanding.

Rick tells how, in 1978, he went back to his daddy’s farm, and it hadn’t rained for a long time. He was going to leave again to find a job, but then it rained, a lot. OK, as miracles go, that’s not exactly up there. Now, if it was raining frogs, or gold, or manna from heaven or something, then we can start wondering if this is a message from God. Rick said he took the rain “as God’s real clear message, this is where I want you, son. This is where I want you to be.” What? Where it’s raining? Maybe God was telling you to move to Seattle, you idiot. I have news for you, Rick—when it finally rains after a long dry spell, that is not “supernatural.” I think the term you are looking for is “completely natural.” Of course I’m sure that Rick Perry’s radar for messages from God only works for the messages he wants to hear. I have a feeling that if God has something to tell Rick that Rick doesn’t want to hear, God is going to have a very difficult time getting through. If a giant hand appeared in the sky and wrote the words “Rick Perry, Do Not Run for President!” in the clouds, I’m pretty sure that Rick Perry would not take that as any sort of sign from God. No, Rick Perry would think that’s just natural forces at work—just like global warming.

Speaking of Rick Perry’s mistakes, the Supreme Court has agreed to halt and review the case of a man sentenced to die in Texas for apparently being black. Statistically speaking, that is rare. All death penalty cases are appealed. The Supreme Court literally gets asked to stop several executions in Texas almost every week. I’m sure when the Supreme Court gets an appeal to halt an execution in Texas, they first think “Texas? Didn’t we see this appeal yesterday? And the day before. And the day before that.”

Today’s Homework | Discuss

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