Monday, October 4, 2010

Randi Rhodes: Faith, Meatballs & Firearms

CNN anchor Rick Sanchez has been fired after a bizarre rant in which he called Jon Stewart a bigot and said that the media is controlled by Jews. Your first question is obviously, why is this guy not working for Fox News? Of course, if Sanchez was working for Fox News, he’d still be working for Fox News. As it is, the comments from Sanchez were a scandal. If they were made on Fox & Friends, it would just be another Friday.
Bill Maher has released his latest Christine O’Donnell clip (video below). This time Christine expanded on the “dabbling” theme. In addition to dabbling in witchcraft, she said “I was dabbling into every other kind of religion before I became a Christian. I’ve dabbled in Buddhism.” Can you really just “dabble” in Buddhism? What does that involve? Just a smidgen of enlightenment? But the dabbling didn’t stop there. Christine said “I would have become a Hare Krishna but I didn’t want to become a vegetarian.” Really. Christine said she decided against being a Hare Krishna “because I’m Italian, I love meatballs.” So what are you saying, Christine? That you were ultimately drawn to Christianity because they let you eat what you wanted? There’s a good motto for Christianity: “Come for the salvation, stay for the non-restrictive diet.” In the wake of a shooting incident at the University of Texas, Governor Rick Perry is calling for allowing concealed weapons on campuses. It would definitely change the nature of the classroom. If students raise their hands, you won’t know if they’re asking a question or surrendering. I think Rick Perry’s plan is just to make Texas so crazy that the rest of the states will actually ask it to secede.
Four states now explicitly allow guns in bars. Those states are Tennessee, Georgia, Arizona, and Virginia—just in case you want to know where you can loaded before you get loaded. Alcohol can cloud your judgment. But then how much judgment does a person who brings a gun into a bar have in the first place? If we allow guns in bars, how long until somebody wants to start serving cocktails at shooting ranges? Face it, having guns in bars is an invitation to disaster. All you have to do is visit the men’s room in any bar to realize that bar patrons have absolutely no aim at all.

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