Randi Rhodes: GOP Fight Night

It's Friday, ya bastids!

Last night’s GOP debate was at least entertaining, as long as you’re convinced none of this bunch can ever really become president. Republicans would like this field of candidates to be a “Field of Dreams,” but looking at the group that gathered last night, if they had to be described using the name of a baseball movie, it would be “Eight Men Out.” OK, Michele Bachmann is not a man. And nobody is more disappointed in that than Marcus Bachmann.

Hardly anyone even tried to lay a hand on front-runner Mitt Romney. The most damaging quote against Mitt Romney from yesterday came from Mitt’s afternoon campaign appearance where he declared “Corporations are people, my friend!”

Things got a little heated last night. I had expected sparks to fly, but frankly, I thought the sparks would be from Michele Bachmann’s brain short-circuiting, not from an attack by Tim “Pit Bull” Pawlenty. Last debate, Tim Pawlenty was afraid to go after Mitt Romney. This debate he went after a girl… and lost. Tim Pawlenty attacked Michele Bachmann’s record of legislative accomplishments. Hello, Tim! Michele Bachmann is not in Congress to make laws. She’s there to make trouble. And that, she has accomplished. Tim said of Michele “It’s not her spine we’re worried about, it’s her lack of results.” To be fair, Michele Bachmann is only one of 435 members of the House. There isn’t a lot she can do as one person. And that’s the reason the United States of America is still standing. Michele Bachmann proved that she can let criticism just bounce off of her. But then Michele Bachmann can let reality just bounce off of her.

The worst moment of the night came when every single candidate raised their hands to indicate they would reject a budget with ten times more spending cuts than revenue increases. Essentially they were saying “Nobody on this stage can or will do anything to address the deficit problems.” Why stop at 10-to-1? They all would have said they’d reject a bill with a ratio of 100-to-1, or a million-to-1, or if the only tax increase was $1 to be collected on Casey Anthony alone.

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